Paucity of Intimacy

Women seem to prefer new clothes to sex  and would give up sex for 15 months if they could get a closet full of new clothes according to this survey of 1000 women between 18 and 54.

Another survey says most adults, especially women,  would prefer to cuddle up with a good book than make love to their partner.

Americans, 65% of us, are spending more time with their computers than with their spouses according to this survey.   

We develop significant relationships with cars, trucks and other machines but  most of us are increasingly  dependent on our tech gadgets, our cellphones, iPods and  Blackberrys and lust over the ones we don't have. 

Are you surprised  that 1 in 8 blokes would swap their girlfriend for an iPod?

We get addicted to the power, the connection, the feedback and immediate response.  Crackberries sound familiar?

And when we have trouble, we feel angry, sad or lonely/alienated.

Not that long ago I was told that the reason humans have such big brains or more exactly,  large pre-frontal cortexes, was to handle the complexity of language and social relationships. Actually size doesn't matter as much as the number of folds that give more surface area, say to organizing large groups for hunting, that gave humans the evolutionary edge. 

Today, we are more socially isolated and have fewer friends, two not three to confide in.  About a quarter of us have no one to confide in, no opportunities for intimate social ties. 

No wonder we're turning to machines and the Internet for emotional sustenance.

The steep decline in social ties is evident in other modern, aging countries.  In Japan as increasing numbers of men retire and stay-at-home, some Japanese men apparently need lessons in calling their wives by their first names, helping with housework and saying I love you.

It seems to me we're becoming less human.