January 30, 2014

'She is part of me, so here I am whole,'

Man who spent over 20 years holding vigil by his wife's grave EVERY day dies aged 97

When Rocky Abalsamo's wife died in 1993, part of him died too.  Out of sadness and longing, he would hold vigil by her grave site at St. Joseph Cemetery in West Roxbury all day, every day, rarely eating or drinking and weathering all temperatures and conditions.

Now, over 20 years after his beautiful Julia 'Julita' passed away, Rocky 'Roque' continues to sit next to his beloved, after being buried in the plot next to her.  Rocky died on Janaury 22 at Stonehedge Health Care Center in West Roxbury after several months of declining health, reports The Boston Globe.  He was 97.

 Rocky Abalsamo-Devoted-Griever
'She was pure love,' he said.  'Her beauty was a gift apart, a reward.'

They shared a first kiss on September 16, 1937 - a date Rocky - celebrated annually - and married the following April.  They had a daughter, Angela, and a son, Roque Jr.

Rocky and Julita had been married for 55 years when she died of complications after heart surgery in 1993 . Distraught, he began spending his days at St. Joseph Cemetery.
'She is part of me, so here I am whole,' he said previously.
'Being here makes me feel better. Not good, but better. I do it for Julita, and for myself.'

Each morning he would greet Julia - 'I am here!' - unfold his blue chair and unpack the belongings he would bring with him, such as photos and other tokens.

He rarely ate or drank, mostly out of respect but also so he does not need a bathroom, and would toast Julita with sparkling cider on special occasions, such as her birthday on December 20.

At night he would pray and sprinkle crumbs on the grave so that chipmunks would keep her company after he leaves.
Posted by Jill Fallon at January 30, 2014 10:33 PM | Permalink